Ep. 27 | From Head to Heart: Coaching and Personal Growth Insights with Lisa Dare

Written By Sarah Bettman
 
 

In Episode 27 of the *Live Stoked, Lead Stoked* podcast, I had a profound conversation with guest Lisa Dare about living a fully integrated and authentic life. Among other topics, we go into the significance of incorporating the head and heart in personal development, the cultural acceptance of coaching, embracing failure, and the essence of human relationships. Here's a deep dive into our conversation that provides a roadmap for leading a life that is authentically stoked.

The Significance of Integration

Lisa opened the discussion by exploring the concept of living an integrated life, contrasting it with mere authenticity. Emphasizing the need for integrating all parts of ourselves, including our light and shadow aspects, she articulated that this comprehensive acceptance forms the bedrock of true authenticity. She shared:

 "Living an authentic life is living a fully integrated life... learning how to integrate and be with all those parts of ourselves without judging them." 

She illuminated the conversation by rejecting the traditional black-and-white outlook on our persona, advocating for embracing all facets of oneself, even those that might induce embarrassment or shame. This holistic perspective on self-acceptance is not only about celebrating our strengths but also acknowledging the less favorable aspects that constitute our true selves.

Embracing Complexity and Recommitting to Relationships

Both Lisa and I resonated with the idea of recommitting to relationships—personal and professional—and the importance of empathy and understanding.

Lisa expresses her experiences:

 "The importance of constantly creating safe spaces for sharing, maintaining grace, and understanding—especially in difficult moments."

This translates into actionable steps for fostering healthier and more resilient relationships, emphasizing acceptance during tumultuous times and the proactive creation of safe environments for open communication.

Navigating From Head to Heart

Lisa reflected on her predominant roles and the expectations tied to them. As a daughter of immigrant parents, a sister, a professional pharmacist, and a leader, she discussed navigating the tensions and alignments between her cultural identity as a Canadian-born Chinese and broader societal expectations. Her journey from academia to coaching underscored the movement from a head-centric approach to a heart-led existence.

She shared a moment that nudged her toward this shift:

"When enrolling in coaching courses, it fundamentally changed my perspective, leading to a new way of thinking and being over the last 20 years."

The Dance of Letting Go and Embracing What Is

Towards the end of our conversation, we both shared personal stories of caregiving and navigating loss. Caring for a parent with Alzheimer's taught Lisa valuable lessons in empathy, patience, and creativity, underscoring the shifting dynamics in roles and identities. We emphasized the importance of letting go, finding resolution, and making loved ones feel safe and loved.

Why Integration Matters

Lisa’s journey from head to heart serves as a testament to the transformative power of embracing an integrated life. Our conversation illuminates a path of self-compassion, continued learning, and authentic living. As Lisa noted, embracing complexity and diverse aspects of our identity without judgment leads us closer to living our most authentic, stoked lives.

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More About Live Stoked | Lead Stoked

Have you ever wondered if there is something more? Are you ready for something to change, but aren’t sure how to get started…or even what to change? Do you dream of living life on your own terms, full of purpose and the ability to choose what’s best for you? Are you ready to live stoked?

You’ve come to the right place! In this podcast, we will explore what it means to live stoked. To live a life on your terms, one where we’ve tossed away the pressures of roles, expectations, and identities that have been put on you and that you did not choose, is a bold choice. Frankly, it’s a series of small choices in micro-moments that lead to a bold life.

I am Sarah Bettman, coach, consultant, and speaker, but more importantly, I’m a person who found myself waking up in the wrong life and needed to find a way to me. 

I am on a mission to unravel the things we tell ourselves, the roles and/or identities we’ve taken on, and the expectations that drive our decision making, so that we can begin to live our most authentic and stoked lives. My guests and I will share our stories, solutions, and multitude of ideas…since one size definitely doesn’t not fit all. 

My hope is that you will find something meaningful for you, in the moment, that will move you forward on your path.

Sarah Bettman
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Ep. 28 | We Are Not Failing...We Are Growing!
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Ep. 26 | From Bankruptcy to Empowerment: Wendy Petties' Path to Financial and Personal Fulfillment